Taming the Lying Tongue

The LORD destests lying lips, but he delights in men who are truthful.

Proverbs 12:22

Admit it, you have told a lie at some point in your life.  From the little white lie that you thought was innocent to the big ole whopper that you told to keep from looking bad.  a UMass study done in 2002 discovered that in a normal everyday 10 minute conversation at least 2 our of 3 people tell at least one lie.  Most don't even realize how much they are lying!  So why do we lie?

More often than not it boils down to self-esteem.  Men tend to lie to make themselves look or feel better, while women tend to lie to make the other person feel better.  But you already know that don't you?  Pegues says that lying comes in four primary forms:  deceitfulness, half-truths, exaggerations, and flattery.  In my mind it all comes down to self-esteem.  We all want to look good, we all want to feel loved, and we want to feel as if we are important.  So what is so wrong with a little white lie if it doesn't hurt anyone?

First, the obvious answer...God hates lies.  It goes completely against His nature.  Titus 1:2 tells us that God doesn't lie.  In the NKJ version it says God CANNOT lie.  We were created in His image so it has to grieve His heart to see us do something so contrary to who He is.  God hates lying so much that we are told "All liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death" (Revelation 21:8).  Lying can cause us to be eternally separated from God.  I don't know about you, but that alone makes me want to tame my tongue when it comes to lying!

Then there is the harm we do to others by lying.  It creates false impressions.  That little white lie (Yes, that dress looks good on you!), while told to make someone feel better actually can damage relationships.  What happens when the truth is told by someone else.  Trust is lost.  The person you lied to feels as if you don't value them enough to tell them truth, or worse they feel like you intentionally attempted to humiliate them or make them look silly.  Don't think they will ever find out?  You may be right, but do you really want a relationship built on lies?  Are you really showing that person you love and care for them if you can't be honest with them? 

Lying also hurts us.  It is as if we are saying, "I don't think that you will think I am good enough, so I am going to make myself appear better and not give you a chance to think poorly of me".  Problem is that most of us tend to not be very good liars (remember we weren't created to be liars at all!).  Over time we get our half-truths, exaggerations, white lies, and whoppers confused.  Others start to realize that we aren't the person we pretend to be.  So rather than people learning about the unique, wonderful, awesome person God created each of us to be, we introduce them to the lie that Satan has convinced us we must be in order to be valued.  After all, we are fearfully and wonderfully made and God's works are all wonderful, that includes you and me.  (Psalm 139:14)  Why do we think we need to improve upon what God has created us to be?  When we lie to improve our own or other's opinions of ourselves it is as if we are saying that God didn't do a good enough job. 

God knows every word we will utter before it ever leaves our mouth.  (Psalm 139:4)  Today let us chose to honor Him by chosing to be honest.  That doesn't mean saying hurtful things to others, after all we are told that our words are for building up and encouraging our brothers and sisters  (1 Thessalonians 5:11, Ephesians 4:29).  It also doesn't mean keeping quiet either.  2 Timothy tells us that Scripture is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting, and training (3:16).  In other words, if you have to do these things, be sure you can back it up with God's Word, and do it in love.  Love covers a multitude of sins. And if all else fails, don't speak!

Deliver my soul, O LORD, from lying lips, and from a deceitful tongue ~Psalm 120:2

My mouth speaks what is true, for my lips detest wickedness.  all the words of my mouth are just; none of them is crooked or perverse ~Proverbs 8:7-8

Today Lord, I thank you for the mercy and forgiveness that you extend to me through Your Son.  Forgive me for the lies I have told, forgive me for grieving You.  Help me to tame this tongue of mine.  Help me to trust that I don't need to lie to appear better than I am because You have created me, and your creations are wonderful.  Help me to lean on Your Word when speaking to others, to use truth in all situations, to trust that by doing this I honor You.  In Your Son's name I pray.